Thursday, 16 August 2007 - 8:57 AM EDT
Name:
cummings2004
Home Page:
http://cummings2004.angelfire.com
Hello all!
Maybe since this is my site, I should be the one to start us off here. Allright.... I grew up poor, in a small town in Maine. My parents were never really into working for a living, like the rest of us, and always relied on my 2 older siblings and I to make sure the bills were paid. Wether we were shoveling snow to get money for heat, or going to highschool and working at the same time, to put food on the table; they always used us, for EVERYTHING!!! After all the help that I gave them, the kicked me out of the house, in fear that the state would catch on, that they wer'nt reporting all the income that had been comming into the house. Like it was MY FAULT, they were ripping the state off!!!
When I was 12, I found a video camera in our bathroom hamper... My father had been doing this for years, and years, to my sister, and I and all of our friends... When we confronted him, he had a lame excuse for it, and insisted that it wasn't what it had looked like, though my big sister and I had found smashed up video tapes under the bathroom counter. We have never told my mother about it, because at the time, she was trying to get pregnant, (with my baby sister), and had had two miscariges, and we didn't feel the need to put more stress on her. Though, I don't know how she wouldn't have known anyway.
So, now I have to face the fact that my 7 year old sister, could be going through the same thing me, my big sister, and brother went through; but she has no one to turn to....And, the worst part of it all is that IT'S MY FAULT, if something happens to her, because I never said anything about it. But, at 12 years old, I was so worried about destroying my family, that that is all I could think about.
I thought that with time and prayer, I would be healed from this, but I'm not. I think about it on a daily basis... I don't know how to get this out of my head, and my heart. I want to be able to forgive, but all I find is bitterness and anger.
Please help me find a way to get rid of this memory. It's eats at me everyday. I just need to talk to somebody who understands.
Thanks,
Stacy
vegas lucky
. My name is Stacy and my husbands is Mark. With his help and yours, i would love to have this site be a bulletin board for everyone out there who has ever had a hurt or stuggle in there lives... l wanna hear your story. Lets help eachother overcome the battles and build a bond together based on understanding, and openess. l would really appreciate any help l can get to get this site going.Thank you all for your coaperation.